All introverts know that one’s own company is a damn good time. But when I was writing this post, I thought of that statement and wondered, “Am I really introverting effectively?”

Walk with me.

When I refer to introverting, or just being an introvert, I’m talking about the preferred way one creates, stores, and receives energy. For instance, if you like spending time at home, with a small group of friends and generally away from crowds, you’re an introvert. If you get recharged away from people, you’re an introvert. And that’s great! You’re my people. We are one.

However, I want to challenge my fellow introverts to really think about the way they spend all of that me time. Are you being introspective while in your cocoon? Are you introverting at the optimal level?

Sure, many of us enjoy reading a great book or watching a movie, but maybe your adulting while introverted should also include working towards dreams, forcing yourself to eat vegetables (thus, forcing yourself to buy vegetables because you buy your own food), packing a lunch (because you have a budget), and keeping your mental health in check.

Keeping in balance is a great priority to make. Thoughts and dreams are usually not all that random. As fellow cave dwellers, I have no doubt that you are familiar with journaling. It’s great for getting all of those thoughts down. But remember: you’re just talking to yourself. This in and of itself is biased, reviewing your subconscious through your own perspective. Not optimal.

Talk to some outsiders. Try it.

If you have a bestie, reach out to them. Recently, my bestie (owner of this blog, fellow introvert and all around kick-ass woman) has allowed me to treat her like my dream journal. Her perspective is one I’ve always valued. And, in the interest of keeping it 100, she knows me better than anyone (and I, her, so I know she’ll tell me the truth easy to swallow or not). Dating, parental relationships, self esteem, spirituality and current events…nothing is off bounds.

With our conversations, always completely transparent, I’ve been able to introvert proactively and effectively. My subconscious can be a rude b*tch, but with BFF’s reasoning, I listen to and appreciate her more.

Be an effective introvert.

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Imani Josey

Imani is a writer from Chicago, Illinois. After graduating Howard University in Washington, DC, Imani received her Masters from Northwestern University. Sometime during all of that studying, she danced professionally for the Chicago Bulls as a (Luvabulls) cheerleader, and won the titles of Miss Chicago and Miss Cook County for the Miss America Organization, as well as Miss Black Illinois USA. Read her short story “North” in the forthcoming Hidden Youth anthology, out November 2016 by Crossed Genres.

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